Kandinsky Sunday - I'm just big-boned!

Yesterday I went to a horrible place. I was awaken from my beauty sleep at 7am to go to the vet. But it wasn't just any morning. It was 16° outside! This has to be animal cruelty! Tarina, after stuffing me into the carrier bag from hell, started spinning me around like it was funny. Then they took me outside in this bitter cold, threw me in the back of the car and took me away. When I got to the vet's office, there were all these strange creatures. They all look like gigantic versions of Chubacachakalacadingdong. The funny thing was that one of them was named Cisco, just like Mr. Meany.

After the vet looked me all over (and I mean all over) and did things I don't even want to mention, she took some notes and called the mortal to come and pick me up. After I got home, the mortal read the notes. The vet had the nerve of writing that I was overweight! She wasn't brave enough to say it to my face? I'm not overweight! I'm just big-boned, dammit! How many times I am going to have to say it? What part of big-boned don't you understand?

Now the mortal wants to put me on a diet. Oh, this is going to be war...